Well this one is a
tag-post...I generally don’t do personal posts but somehow i want to talk
my heart out for a change...and what better way to do this ...Thanks a lot
Benny for the tag.Writing about "The TV
character with whom i can relate the most/Is a mirror image of me" -
has to be Peyton Sawyer from One Tree Hill.
So
here goes the similarities...........
"I'm
just a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside a bitch"-Peyton Sawyer (exactly my
words)
1. Peyton
Sawyer and me are both tall, skinny , complicated, hyper-moody, eccentric, at
times delusional, often misunderstood girl .She was a cheerleader who's the least
cheeriest person in the world, ironically. She is a walking contradiction and belongs
to the popular crowd but felt most of an outsider. She's angry and she's alone
and most of the time she uses her selfish boyfriend Nathan as an excuse to be
mad with despair.....That pretty much sums up my personality traits,...I had
been a part of the school Fashion Club and later on joined a Fashion College with
a glossy superficial “Fashionable” life...but was a nerd, introverted and
de-glam person from inside ..... went to the best parties ,belonged to the
so-called “Cool” crowd but always felt lonely....always felt like an
outsider.
2. Probably
the things that give her character the edge is her self-possession and
determination to fight back. Despite the piles of mud thrown at her and even
when she's kicked to the ground, her ability to maintain her integrity is what
gets her living. She's proud, ambitious and even appears too cold. But she also
undergoes a wave of torrent emotions that a weaker person may not handle. She's
strong, that's what she is known for. She's not the type who gets rescued
unless she badly needs to be saved from herself. To her friends, she's taciturn
and philosophical, an old soul trapped in a teenage girl's body. She's hard and
she's stubborn. Sometimes she hardly knows how she feels until it's already too
late. And although bad things kept happening to her, she rises up to these
obstacles, always enduring even in defeat. ......That’s exactly how I define myself.
2.Perpetually cranky
Peyton tears around town in a vintage car, listening to loud rock, and wearing
a Ramones T-shirt, none of which fits with a typical cheerleader image. At one
point, Lucas asks her why she's a cheerleader, noting that she's 'the least
cheery person I know'. That was hell lot of me during my school and college
days...the rock band tees, converse, cranky and mercurial behavior, love for
punk and rock, association with music and art...I’ve never seen someone who resembles
me and my life to that extent.
3. I see Peyton as my
mirror-image. Just like me, Peyton as we see is Angry, Bitchy and a Maniac
Depressive. Instead of self-pity she channels herself into
various productive ways like art and music. Grasping on hope, we constantly draw, wishing that maybe someday our
art could reach out to someone and give them faith; a faith we are desperately
clinging onto. We know that our life is superficial, like in Peyton’s Case: a
popular status as a cheerleader with a basketball star as her boyfriend; late
night parties, getting wasted on beer; mornings when she follows a crowd she
feels an outsider to. Anger and sadness motivate her art to be provocative and
elusive, distinguishing the reality and the make-believe she can take it all
back if she tried harder enough....We share the same life-story with the same
attitude towards life...same
regrets...same realisations...the same feeling of
being lonely.
4. She lives with a
heavily guarded heart, as she has lost so many important people in her life and
so do I because of similar reasons.
5. What difference does it make if you get with the popular
guy or go to the right parties, or you know the moves to some moronic cheer to
do at some lame-ass game, which I could care less about! Because at the end of
the day none of it matters!During the first
season Peyton Sawyer is girlfriend to popular jock/star basketball player
Nathan, but they soon break up when Peyton reasons that their relationship is
more about sexual benefits than love, and that she is tired of his cruelty and
regular insulting behavior. There was as side of her to which Nathan never paid
attention to, nor understood. ...Been there, experienced that. Like her dating
the so called "Popular-Guy", mindless fucking , constant verbal abuse
and regular arguments had put me off relationships
forever and we are scared to love or be loved.
6.She has a romantic
interest in her ex's brooding half brother, Lucas. Through various interactions
with Lucas, she finds that he is kind and thoughtful towards her. However, when
he confesses the depths of his need and want for her, she becomes scared and
runs away from him; Lucas is left heartbroken and desperate. ....Again been
there, done that. Like Peyton I have disappeared and withdrawn from people who
had confessed their love and concern for me because I was scared that they
might hurt me or I might lose them. Like her I had constant commitment and
relationship issues and suffer from severe "Relationship Dysfunction"
(according to my friends).
7."You know I've got
this theory, there are two kinds of people in the world. There are lyric people
and music people. You know, the lyrics people tend to be analytical. You know,
all about the meaning of the song. They're the ones you see with the CD insert
out like 5 minutes after buying it, pouring over the lyrics, interpreting the
hell out of everything. Um, then there’s the music people, like Brooke. Who
could care less for the lyrics as long as its just got like a good beat and you
could dance to it. I don’t know, sometimes it might be easier to be a music
girl and not a lyric girl. But since I’m not, let me just say this. Sometimes
things find you when you need them to find you, I believe that. And for me its
usually song lyrics."- Peyton Sawyer
.....That’s exactly my theory.
8.Peyton is always seen
in her bedroom, sketching on a pad in front of her 24-hour webcam while
listening to what her boyfriend Nathan labeled as "loser rock." Her
taste in music evolved through years of trying to find a soundtrack to fit her
melodrama and angst. She listens to guitar-driven tracks with lyrics that speak
about redemption. She's not swayed by the fads but considers her music like her
art; a sacred choice to where her dreadful ideas about life's obstacles are
coming in full-view. Her music symbolizes a lot about her. She has a broad CD
collection, most are from her mother when she was still alive. She's fond of
collecting different songs and putting them on CDs, labeling them by whatever
nostalgic mood she is feeling that day. These are what she calls her "mix
tapes."....Creepy ,but yes even I’m that way.
9.Like me everything about Peyton Sawyer is
art and music, sight and sound. She finds connection through music and like her
art, she tries to use this connection to form alliances from the people she
considers worthy of her attention. We are as selective to our music as we are
selective of our friends .However cold we may seem, we are surprisingly
passionate when we talk about rock music, as if it is our religion. Like me, Peyton
would describe every significant event in her life that was inspired by a song
or an artist. We love music and believe that it can change the world and a
concert that would be performed for that same reason, can also save lives.
